Horror's going through a vampire Renaissance right now: Twilight, True Blood, Vampire Diaries, Let the Right One In. Basically, pale blood-sucking hotties are to today's pop culture landscape what one-liner-spewing sitcoms were to '90s TV: ubiquitous, addicting and utterly irresistible. Oh, Family Matters, where art thou!?

So last month during my Tokyo Tour of Terror, I heard some buzz about a vampire-themed restaurant located among the high-end shops in the city's Ginza section; of course, I had to check it out.

Themed restaurants are something of a kitschy institution in the city, ranging from jail-themed eateries where patrons eat inside cells, to hospital-themed ones, to one where you chow down on gourmet European fare in papier-mache cocoons (my personal favorite). Trends and themes, ranging from broad to obscure and esoteric, are taken to their absolute max in Japan: it's go big or don't go at all.

After scanning some reviews written by American tourists about the Vampire Cafe, and cruising the restaurant's Kanji-only website, it was pretty clear that I'd have to bring in reinforcements, so I bribed – I mean, asked – my friend, Marc to join me.

Marc happens to be one of those American computer guys who took Japanese in high school and collected manga. He even took his Japanophile-ism to the next level and moved to Tokyo to find his petite Asian wife and live happy ever after as a gaijin (foreigner). Well, actually, he just designs iPhone apps. And I don't think he's into manga and he didn't take Japanese in high school. But his wife is Japanese. Marc's awesome.

Here was our night vamping it up:

The Japanese penchant for adding a side of mayonnaise to dishes you'd never expect to eat with mayo confounds me, and it was a little off-putting at the Vampire Cafe where I'd hoped for more blood with my pasta. The menu was still pretty entertaining: in addition to "beer cockteils" (spelled like that!) you could also order the "Three Weapons" dish, which we opted not to mostly because Marc couldn't figure out what we'd actually be ordering. At that point, he lost a few Awesome Points.

Contrary to what I filmed, there were more than just three courses to our meal; overall the food was delicious. (And yes, it really was THAT RED in there.) Both Marc and I expected more gore, although the surprise cuteness wasn't bad – I mean, dessert in the shape of guy and gal vampires holding hands? Hello, cute overload.

One of my favorite things about Tokyo is that no one is to cool to get in on the kitsch factor. After all, taking a theme like vampires to the maximum requires commitment from everyone, including the waitstaff: they were dressed as French maids because, according to our waitress, they were "possessed by the master vampire and carried out his orders." Seriously. She said that.

I ended my evening at the Vampire Cafe, with a full belly and a newfound desire to eat all my meals near a prop coffin. I fell asleep thinking, "Oh, Tokyo, mon amour. You've got me under your weird, wacky, oddball, horrific, mayo-loving spell once again."

And I'm serious about that Princess Heart restaurant. I've got my tiara ready.