One of those tragically weak horror weeks at the DVD store, my friends.
Don't be fooled by the familiar-yet-alluring cover on The Last Resort. I just watched it, and it's really pretty terrible. A bunch of obnoxious bridesmaids head to Mexico and come across a vague and gory horror.
A colorful handful of titles for the first week of August:
Mutant Chronicles -- More futuristic action / adventure than horror, but it does have mutated monsters who slash people up, so I say it qualifies for FEARnet consideration. If only for the cast alone...
The Chaos Experiment -- Val Kilmer stars in something that sounds a lot like a combination of Saw, An Inconvenient Truth, and the upcoming The Killing Room. Some guy holds six people captive in a freezing room. Fun. Also with Armand Assante.
The Beast -- A TV mini-series based on one of Peter Benchley's goofier novels. And that's saying something.
Come on down to your local video shop because it's [REC] week, folks! That's right, you can get wrecked with [REC] while sitting fully erect once you settle down with the Spanish flick that FEARnet called "a shock-a-minute masterpiece," and I can vouch for those five words because I wrote 'em! If you liked Quarantine, and I actually did, then be prepared for a movie that makes Quarantine look like Quakers. No offense to the Dowdle brothers, who did a fine job of bringing American accents to a flick that, frankly, didn't really need 'em ... but [REC] is a very special little horror film indeed. Enough said.
Another limp week at the DVD stores for the horror freaks, although...
...I doubt you bothered to see The Unborn when it played theaters earlier this year, which means you're still just a liiiiiiitle bit curious about the movie. Horror geeks are crazy that way. But really, flicks like this are what your Netflix queue was invented for. (Better yet, it's probably worth the $1 rental charge at your local Redbox thingie.) Written and directed by the normally reliable David Goyer, it's about a pretty girl haunted by a dead kid. And if you're thinking of the "unrated" edition, think again: It's less than a minute longer than the theatrical cut. Oooh, "too shocking for theaters," my butt.
This is one weak week. I can think of two titles worthy of (perhaps) a rental, and not much more.
Fans of Japanese horror may be interested in the remake of the classic Kwaidan, and the new one comes from Hideo Nakata, director of several 'Rings' and maybe a Grudge too. (Nope, Dark Water, actually.) The 1957 original is considered one of the best horror films (perhaps) ever, so I'll approach this one with a dash of skepticism. But approach I shall.
I hope you enjoyed last month's non-stop Jason-fest, because this week it's back to the same old complaint: Not enough horror DVDs, and not nearly enough good ones!
The most interesting release this week is a slasher flick called Simon Says. Starring Crispin Glover and directed by the helmer of Harry and the Hendersons, the flick played a few years ago at Fantastic Fest, and I thought it was ... OK. Not terrible. So-so, even, but I'll be giving the flick a fresh look this weekend. Truly, nothing starring Crispin Glover could ever be completely worthless. Plus there's a commentary a supplemental what-not, so that's a good thing...
OK, kids. You've been patient. We've all suffered through multiple weeks of sincerely LAME horror DVDs ... but today is a big day. I hope you saved a few dollars, especially if you're a Jason freak...
Remember last week? When I was whining about it being a skimpy week and talking about stuff like Razortooth and Anaconda 4? (Those are two different movies.) Well, guess what? This week makes last week look like Christmas week -- only there aren't all that many horror DVDs come Christmas week. So let's say Halloween week.
Today looks like a pretty cheesy day for the horror DVDs, and it seems easier to break them down by category...
For example, we get not one, not two, but three new B-movies about monster attacks in water this week. The first, Silent Venom stars Luke Perry and Tom Berenger and deals with a deadly snake on a submarine. The second flick is called Razortooth, which is about a man-eating eel with crazy-ass teeth. Third is Anacondas: Trail of Blood, which marks the fourth entry in the seemingly endless Anaconda series. So if you're looking for some waterlogged monster lunacy, this is the week for you.
DVD releases are generally pretty skimpy during a "holiday week," and of course that trickles down to the horror shelves as well. Nothing too exciting this final Tuesday of May, but there are (at least) a few titles that seem worthy of the Netflix treatment.
All sorts of strange little treats this week, with a big main course full of vampiric craziness.....
True Blood S1 -- The highly-celebrated HBO vampire series finally hits the DVD shelves, and the horror fans are (rightly) salivating at the 5-disc mega-set (complete with numerous featurettes and a half-dozen audio commentaries). I've only seen the first three episodes, but they were more than enough to get me hungry for more. Expect a thorough review here at FEARnet real soon.
My Bloody Valentine 3-D -- I'm curious (and a bit skeptical) regarding the 2-D presentation, but if the 3-D DVD edition works, then heck yes this is worth a spot in your collection. Available in (separate) 2-D and 3-D versions, but the edition I'm getting has an audio commentary, a second disc full of goodies, and four pairs of 3-D glasses!
A few Part 3s, a few indies, and a few Blus in a slightly sedate week at the horror shelf:
The Grudge 3 -- The director of the very cool Splinter returns to the Grudg-iverse (he directed some of the shorts a few years back and FEARnet’s Devil’s Trade) to deliver the franchise's first R-rated entry. Shawnee "Saw" Smith joins the series as a woman who pokes around in a house that oughtn't be poked. Extras include two featurettes and some deleted scenes. (Also available today: The American version of The Grudge on Blu-Ray.)
