Member Blog Post
I can't shake the feeling that waffles aren't to be trusted. True, true, if the waffle and the pancake were in an ultimate cage fight to the death, the waffle would probably win hands down with all that stupid crispiness. Let me tell you why I'm a pancake person. First and foremost, the waffle requires the work of a knife and fork. That's physical work my friends, and that is just pointless whilst eating something drippin' with butter and syrup. Aunt Jemima's fat ass doesn't use a knife to eat her pancakes does she? The pancake is flat, always the same, easy to eat, soaks up the yummy goodness of whichever flavor syrup you fancy, it's just plain good. You can eat them in a box, you can eat them with a fox, and you don't have to have no geedee knife to do it. Now look at the different varieties...do waffles have variety? Yes, but they don't make sense. Who eats chocolate or strawberry and cream cheese filled waffles? NOBODY! Jesus wouldn't, that's for damn sure. But behold the pancake's varieties. Strawberry, buckwheat, blueberry, chocolate chip, lemon ricotta, and on and on...the sound just rolls off the tongue. Blueberry pancakes. That sounds nice doesn't it? The pancake is also eaten as a savory dish in many different cultures. Are waffles? Fuck no. To all you waffle lovers, this is a big, steamy, oh so soft stack of in your face. I need a world of pancakes and today, this day...I see glory on the horizon in flourescent shades of red, white, and blue and that my friends, looks like this...IHOP.