We here at FEARnet know that good horror flicks are hard to come by. And it must be tough for actors to decide whether they?re jumping on board the next Saw rip-off, or are on track for something more akin to Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys. To show how sensitive we are to the trials and tribulations of picking the right movie, we?ve compiled a list of the worst gigs in which high-profile actors have taken part. We?ve broken it all down into three easy to digest sections: ?Before They Were Famous?, featuring the worst starts of high-profile careers, ?What Were They Thinking??, in which we examine the biggest mid-career mistakes of some of Hollywood?s brightest, and, finally, ?What Happened??, in which we show you how far promising actors fell?and where they ended up! Board up your windows, kill the lights, and fire your agent, folks! It?s time for Famous Faces in Horror!

"Before They Were Famous"

It?s easy to excuse this section. We understand. You?re a fresh new face, you just hopped off the bus to Hollywood. Aside from being a waiter at that new Columbian joint down the street, your best bet is most likely that low-budget horror flick you heard about. These bright stars of today must have chosen wisely, right?

Jennifer Aniston in Leprechaun

Long before she had "Friends", before hordes of women emulated her haircut (?the Rachel?), Jennifer Aniston took her first major role in 1993?s Leprechaun. This low-budget horror flick may have been panned by critics, but it was embraced by genre fans, and made almost eight times its budget in its overall theatrical run. So what if Jennifer started out running for her life from a little green guy protecting his pot of gold? Was it that much worse than making out with Ross on Friends?

Brad Pitt in Cutting Class

Jen?s one-time hubby, Brad Pitt, also dabbled in the lower echelons of cinema during his younger years. In fact, one of Pitt?s first major roles placed him in the high school whodunit Cutting Class (you can watch 'Cutting Class' in its entirety here...you?re welcome!). He played a kid named Dwight, who?s got a nasty attitude and can?t commit to his girlfriend (Jen, you should have taken note!). This flick was pretty rough on all counts, but the presence of Pitt would lead to its resurgence in later years. We?re still waiting for the sequel Cutting Class 2: The Reunion. (Note: No such movie is currently in the works. No such movie will ever be in the works.)

Johnny Depp in A Nightmare on Elm Street

Good ol? Captain Jack Sparrow. Johnny Depp, the eccentric Hollywood superstar, commands millions for appearing in movies these days. It?s hard to imagine that there was ever a time when he wasn?t a major Hollywood player. But then one only has to look to his performance as Glen Lantz (a.k.a. the blood geyser) in A Nightmare on Elm Street. Now, you may protest that this wasn?t a regrettable role for Depp. The film did well commercially and critically, and spawned one of horror?s most beloved franchises, and you?d be right. Except for the fact that there was no way Depp could have known what a hit the movie would be. He basically signed on to be dead meat, little more than ?Dead Teen #4?! Way to go, Mr. Scissorhands?you were once a fountain of Hawaiian Punch.

George Clooney in Return to Horror High

If you?re saying to yourself, ?George Clooney in what?? then fear not! Clooney had the briefest of brief appearances in this flick. Brevity of presence, however, has nothing to do with the fact that this movie was terrible. Thus, Clooney?s presence in the movie makes this a regrettable (or, forgettable) role. Sorry, Mr. Ocean, but Return to Horror High just wasn?t the hit you were hoping it would be. Though, of interesting note, it was one of the first films to try and parody the slasher genre. So maybe if George begins to feel a bit nostalgic, we may see him star in Scary Movie 5.

Philip Seymour Hoffman in My Boyfriend?s Back

Philip Seymour Hoffman wasn?t always an A-Grade, Oscar-winning actor. No, sir, you can?t play Capote every day. While the star gives commanding performances in flicks like Magnolia and The Talented Mr. Ripley, he?s been known to take a dive (Twister, anyone?). Generally regarded as a mildly funny movie about a young man whose love for a girl brings him back from the dead, My Boyfriend?s Back hit the world in 1993. The film featured a young Philip S. in the role of Chuck Bronski. He may not have had the largest part, but hey, it beats being super-glued to a wheelchair and lit on fire, like he was in Red Dragon!

"Why Would They?"

Okay, here?s the scenario. You?re, say, George Clooney. Sure, you made a brief appearance in a few stinkers (as the ?lip synching transvestite? in The Harvest, for example), but you?ve really hit your stride as Dr. Doug on ER, and you?re coming off of the success of the romantic comedy One Fine Day. Then along comes Batman and Robin, and you accept the role. Why wouldn't you? Well, reader-as-Clooney, you?re not alone. In this section we?ll be looking at actors who took a break in the middle of their fabulous careers to make some of the worst films we?ve ever seen! Enjoy!

Denzel Washington in Fallen

Now I should preface this blurb with a disclaimer: I LOVE Fallen. But, seeing as I am one of three official fans of the film, I had to add it to the list. Denzel is a serious-business actor, and this is one of the best definitions of the ?Why Would They?? category. He had won an Oscar years before he did Fallen, and he won one after he did Fallen. He had already done films like Malcom X and Philadelphia, so why in the name of sweet Salisbury steak would he move on to make a movie about a serial killer whose spirit hops from body to body? Denzel played the role of Detective John Hobbes, the man hot on the trail of the bad-touch criminal. Like most on this list, he managed to bounce back quite effectively. His co-star John Goodman? Not so much.

Paris Hilton in Nine Lives

Okay, first off, we?re not making any claims here as to how fabulous of a career Paris has, but let?s face it, the girl?s super famous. When you?re a billionaire heiress, with everything in the world you could ever want, why on this good earth would your first impulse be to star in a B-grade horror movie like Nine Lives ('Nine Lives', of course, is available here)? While Paris may not have much of an acting career to ruin, we feel like she could be doing better things with her time. Like disappearing. Or joining a convent.

Teri Hatcher in Fever

You may know Teri Hatcher as Susan from Desperate Housewives (I know that?s how I know her best!), but she was a successful television actress long before DH (as my gal pals and I refer to it). Hatcher made her first big mark as Lois Lane in the strangely successful Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. So why, we have to wonder, did she go on (mid-career) to make Fever (we proudly present 'Fever' here). The film follows a struggling artist who is implicated in a string of murders, but, more interestingly, also features character actor Bill Duke in a funny little detective?s hat! Luckily for Hatcher, she went on to recover from her appearance in this film. We?re not so sure how Duke is making out.

Robert De Niro in Mary Shelley?s Frankenstein

Dear Mary Shelley?s Frankenstein, why do you exist? Who thought it would be a good idea to make you, when millions of other, better Frankenstein flicks had been made? Robert De Niro, that?s who! Maybe it was the allure of tackling this classic story. Maybe it was the chance to work with actor-director Kenneth Branagh. Maybe it was the chance to look like a stitched up hotdog in a microwave, set to explode. Whatever the case may be, Bobby D took the gig, and will remain a member of the infamous ?What Were They Thinking?? club. Congratulations, Mr. De Niro, you successfully groaned your way through a terrible flick. (And now you, too, can groan your way through 'Mary Shelley's Frankenstein' available here)

Jason Statham in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale

Here?s the big daddy of them all, the biggest ?Why Would They?? mind-f**k. Here we have one of the biggest action stars around teaming up with one of the worst (if not the worst) directors working! Why Jason Statham, smarmily sexy superstar, would ever place himself in the lead role of an Uwe Boll picture is beyond us. In fact, it?s beyond even being beyond us! Statham plays the role of ?Farmer? in the flick. Wondering just how bad this movie sucks it? Here?s a few key titles of posts on the IMDB message board for the film: ?The Worst Casting Ever!!?, ?Hard to digest? and my personal favorite, ?Even the DVD extras suck!?.

"What Happened?"

Times change. Actors fall from grace and the job offers stop flowing. Luckily for them (and us?) the horror genre is here to pick them up and dust them off! This next section looks at actors who used to command performances in big-budget films and popular TV shows, who now have to play ?Victim #1? in straight-to-DVD releases. Bummer.

Joey Lawrence in Tequila Body Shots

Joey Lawrence, you heartthrob! I remember the days when you were all my babysitter could talk about. Now look how far you?ve fallen. Tequila Body Shots? Someone call Blossom! The flick-o follows Joey and his pals on a crazy magical roadtrip through Mexico...and Hell! Joey drinks magical Tequila and gains mind-reading powers, and has to fight for the girl of his dreams in Hell! (Don?t believe that ridiculous plot? Well, we think you should see for yourself. That?s why we bring you the 'Tequila Body Shots' for free! Yeah?that?s why?)

Thora Birch in Dark Corners

Thora Birch started her career with a bang. She won loads of attention for her work in movies like American Beauty and Ghost World, and seemed to be handling teen stardom with gusto. And yet, as time went on, the quality offers became increasingly sporadic. Thora now spends her time playing lead roles in clunkers like Dark Corners. The film follows Birch as a young woman with issues, who, according to the official site, is ?someone being stalked by terrifying creatures.? Yikes! The film?s tagline reads: ?Terror breeds in the shadows of the soul.? Um?excuse me? We wonder what happened to her momentum, but aren?t interested enough to actually watch her current movies to find out.

James Van Der Beek in EVERYTHING after Dawson?s Creek

James Van Der Beek was the name you thought of when you thought of teen hunks in the late 90s, was he not? He had a hit TV show, a string of fairly successful teen movies (who remembers Varsity Blues--come on, raise your hands, don?t be shy!), and was ready to grow into a fine leading man. Then the world must have collectively gotten sick of his face, because into oblivion he fell. Now Van Der Beek stars in sloppy messes like Final Draft. Poor guy, should?ve thrown yourself into the creek while you still had a chance...

Matthew Lillard in The Curve

Now here?s a sad case. How many of you remember watching Lillard with delight in Scream or SLC Punk. How many of you leaned over to your friend or loved one and said something like, ?That guy?s pretty funny? or ?Hey, he could be going places? or even ?With a face as weird as that he?s bound for fame!? Fame indeed, if you consider appearing in the Scooby Doo franchise and Without a Paddle the top of the tops. Well, unfortunately, you would have seen it coming if you would have seen Dead Man?s Curve , a.k.a. The Curve. You may remember this heavy-handed goof-off as it followed the urban legend that if your college roommate committed suicide, you would get a 4.0 for the semester. So what does Lillard do? Yep, you guessed it. And you can probably guess how the rest of the movie pans out. (But you don?t have to! 'The Curve' is available here! on FEARnet!)

Mark Hamill Post-Star Wars

We?ll end this article with the granddaddy of "What Happened?s", Mr. Mark Hamill. You may remember Mark as, oh just the greatest hero in cinema history! Mark Hamill was Luke Skywalker. He was everything that was good! He was a fresh face, he was stardom itself, and?he?s barely acted in a quality live-action picture since! Never before has so high a profile and star fallen so low! Now, don?t get us wrong, Hamill does great voice acting work (we loved him as the Joker in Batman: The Animated Series), but he was really poised for superstardom. Now he appears as a voice actor, and does small roles in films like Reeseville, the midwestern murder mystery! Well, at least he has the fortune he?s made from Star Wars residuals to keep him company...

That raps it up for us. Hope you?ve enjoyed dipping into this strange world of career mistakes with us. Until next time, keep your eyes peeled for more disastrous celebrity career moves (will The Incredible Hulk spell disaster for Ed Norton?) and keep watching FEARnet for all things terrifying!