Some parents dress their kids in duck prints; others go with Elmo. But you're cooler than most parents, therefore your spawn should be as well. If babies are going to suck, let them suck on this vampire smile pacifier. Your kid will be the baddest at the playground without having to throw a single tantrum. Think Geek puts it best: “Makes baby simultaneously quiet and awesome” -- the two most prized qualities in a baby. Bonus: there is a fairly good chance this vampire pacifier will horrify your mother-in-law.