If you don't think True Blood has jumped the shark by this point, I have the final proof that the HBO series has become Twilight with (slightly) more nudity. There is now a line of True Blood cosmetics. On the Home Shopping Network.
This is not True Blood's first foray into cosmetic tie-ins, but this is certainly the most ridiculous. The collection includes a scented body cream, shimmering body powder, a "neutral" nail polish set called Sookie Sookie, and a "dark" set called Bad Things.
All this would be little more than a footnote, a gift guide entry, a non-story. But then there is perfume. And I can't decide which part of the perfume description is my favorite. (Full disclosure: I have not sniffed this scent. It might smell delightful. But I love to mock.) From the website:
"Does your ravishing side beckon? Inspired by HBO's hit series True Blood, this smoldering scent opens with ripe, fruity notes, blooms with a blend of sensuality and complexity, then closes with a mysterious finish. Whether you want to smell irresistible during a romantic moonlight stroll or a naughty night in, its deliciously haunting scent leaves you — and everyone around you — powerless to its charm."
Then there are the "features:"
"Dramatic bottle inspired by vampire fashion and couture brands.
Provocative profile curves like vampire fangs.
Glass boasts deep red lines that seem to swirl like vampire blood as the bottle is turned.
2 ruby-red beads drop seductively down the front of the bottle like blood dripping along the edge of the glass.
Sensuous black lace design decorates the back of the bottle and frames the custom Forsaken logo."
Finally, it seems that they have included every "spooky" ingredient they could find: blood orange; night blooming jasmine; black plum; dark blackberry.
The entire line can be mocked and purchased at HSN.com