Review

Review

Television Tourniquet: We Enter 'The Gates' 1.3

up
25

The Gates Episode 1.3
Breach
Written By: Richard Hatem
Directed By: Terry McDonough
Original Airdate: 11 July 2010

In This Episode...
Weird shit is happening in The Gates - weirder than the vampires, werewolves and witches.  Well, weirder for The Gates.  The community’s super-high-tech, super-expensive, super-private security system is on the fritz.  The system reports false break-ins at many homes, while real break-ins go unnoticed.  The community is on lock down, and tensions run high with Leigh, who blames Marcus’s new girlfriend, Theresa, for the break-ins.  Leigh has discovered that she was affected by the break-ins, and a very special, mystical jeweled box with a Pulp Fiction-like glow goes missing.  Peg gives her “something for the pain,” but bad stuff will happen to Leigh if she is separated from it for too long - like her nose starts bleeding in the middle of the station.

The sheriff puts the pieces together on the robberies when he sees an inordinate number of packages going out through a private courier service, and traces the break-ins back to Mr. Abernathy, a high school teacher who lives outside The Gates.  When Leigh realizes that her secret has been compromised, she confronts the teacher and shoots him.

Claire is still fighting her urges.  At the supermarket, she meets up with an old friend, Christian.  Christian is a vampire who thinks Claire is kidding herself about the decision she made not to hunt.  The two hang out late into the evening, culminating with a hot blood orgy in the alley.  Christian picked up a generic woman and takes her out back to feed.  Claire comes upon them, and cannot pass up the offer for fresh blood.

Brett is caught on security camera when he and his buddies leave The Gates to go run (as in, run with the pack).  His mother panics and grounds him for a month.  His father and brother were both killed by hunters when they went out on a run, and now mommy is overprotective.

Dig It or Bury It?
It feels like tonight’s episode had about 25 minutes of  material that had to be stretched out to fill the whole hour.  As I was describing the “break-in” plot above, I was boring myself.  Was that whole story just a set-up to hint at Leigh’s monsterhood?  Claire’s story was far more interesting, yet it received only slightly more attention that the teen angst triangle that is Brett, Andy, and Charlie.  For those of you who might care about that story, Andy dumped Brett for Charlie.

I feel like The Gates doesn’t know what it wants to be.  It wants to be a little bit Desperate Housewives, without the trashiness, and a little bit Dark Shadows, without the creepiness.  It feels like it has potential to be either really weird and Twin Peaks-y, or really campy and silly like, say, Fido.  At the very least, why make all the monsters “secret?”  We know there are monsters.  Why not revel in it?  Why do we have to spend multiple episodes with the mystery of “what are you?”

Tasty Treats
Claire made some red velvet cupcakes with red velvet frosting that literally made my mouth water.  Her apple tart tatin - which took four tries to perfect - was less delicious-looking.

Entree
The only death went to Generic Girl From Bar.  It was a good’un though.  Christian on the left, Claire on the right, and a victim that was lost somewhere between pleasure and pain.

Creature Feature
Add Deputy Leigh to the list.  What she is has not been revealed yet, but apparently she must stay within close proximity to a secret something in a jeweled box or else she gets nosebleeds.  Sounds like a mummy’s curse.

Prophecies?
Though “next week on” teasers are notoriously fickle, it looks like things finally start to pick up next week, when sheriff Monahan finds out he lives amongst vampires and werewolves.  don’t crap out on me, The Gates.  Next week may be your last chance.

<none>