TV Recap: 'True Blood' Episode 501 - 'Turn! Turn! Turn!'


True Blood Episode 501

"Turn! Turn! Turn!"

Written By: Brian Buckner

Directed By: Daniel Minahan

Original Airdate: 10 June 2012

In This Episode...

We actually pick up this season about five minutes before the end of last season. So while Debbie kills Tara and Sookie kills Debbie, Bill and Eric are at Bill's mansion, cleaning up the mess that Nan and her stormtroopers left behind. They sense Sookie is in trouble and rush to help her - but are caught and kidnapped by the Vampire Authority's proxy.

So let's go with Bill and Eric first. They are in the trunk of a car and work together to devise a means of escape: blowing up the car. They do, and their female captor, Nora, kills her male accomplice. She is a sight for sore eyes, and Nora and Eric kiss passionately. He reveals to Bill that Nora is his sister (gross) by maker (less gross): she is also Godric's progeny. Nora is also a chancellor with the Authority. She set up an escape plan for the guys, but they beat her to it. She has friends at the docks who have obtained new identities for the men in order to escape the Authority, but the Authority catches up with them on the docks. The accomplices are killed and Nora, Eric and Bill are taken into custody.

Next, Sookie and Lafayette. They are hysterical over Tara's death. Pam comes in, and they beg her to turn Tara. It takes a lot of bargaining on Sookie's part, including her promise that she will fix what is broken between Pam and Eric and still owe her one. She agrees, unhappily, and makes no promises about the success of the turn. After Pam drips blood in Tara's mouth, she goes to ground with the corpse. While they wait, Sookie and Lafayette go to deal with Jesus's body, only to discover he is gone without a trace (along with Lafayette's hand chair). They go back to Sookie's house and scrub her kitchen clean, then clean themselves up. Alcide comes over to warn Sookie that Russell has escaped, and encourage her to stay with him for safety. She is reticent, and about to tell Alcide that she killed Debbie, when Lafayette bursts in and stops her.

Jason gets a visit from Reverend Steve Newlin. He is scared and untrusting - rightly so - so Steve retracts his fangs and glamours Jason into getting an invite inside (which seems tantamount vampire rape). Steve confesses his love for Jason ("I'm a gay vampire-American"), and Jason, while flattered, politely explains "this dog doesn't bark that way." Steve doesn't take rejection well, and when he moves to attack Jason, Jessica bursts in, essentially claiming him as hers. Jason takes this as a sign that she wants to renew their relationship. She is having a party at Bill's house, and Jason stops by. In no uncertain terms, she tells him she is not interested in settling down. 

Marcus's pack hunts down Sam and makes threats against Luna and Emma. Even though it was Alcide who killed Marcus, Sam won't sell him out. He goes with the pack, who take him to a barn and try to torture the location of Marcus's body out of him. Martha, who is Marcus's mother, tries for a gentler approach: she wants her son's body so they can honor their fallen pack master. He leads them to the body, and Alcide and Luna meet them there. Alcide confesses that he killed Marcus. Some of the pack bow to him, as this makes him the new pack leader. Others refuse. Martha and a few others honor Marcus by eating his corpse.

Also: Terry's old Marine buddy, Patrick, is in town. He came after he heard about Arlene and Terry's house fire - apparently there has been a spate of house fires amongst their former platoon. Patrick thought Terry was behind it, but now he has narrowed it down to one guy who has gone off the grid. And Holly's sons walk in on her and Andy naked in bed together.

Oh, I almost forgot. Tara. Pam crawls out of the grave when the sun goes down. As far as she is concerned she is done. Sookie runs to the grave and uncovers Tara. Nothing. It didn't work. Sookie weeps over her fallen friend... then Tara wakes and attacks Sookie.

Dig It or Bury It?

I think that I liked this episode more than I would have had season four not been so terrible. The "Previously On" tease before the episode began just made me realize how fucking stupid last season was. Tara becoming a vampire was so predictable it was barely a story point. I don't care if Nora and Eric aren't actual siblings, it is creepy that he calls her his sister and then fucks her brains out. Dexter has a similar storyline going on - Deb in love with her adopted brother. It's just creepy. 

Ass Factor

Eric and Nora have very athletic sex in the storage container on the docks. "We fight like siblings," he tells Bill, "but we fuck like champions."

Blood Count

The background vamps on the docks who are helping Bill and Eric explode into blood fountains when the Authority moves in, but at this point, it is almost rote. Almost.

Biting Humor

Jason to Steve: "Fangs are like twin hard-ons. Hard-ons for trouble and for feeding on someone. But they are never just for talking." 

Also good for a giggle was Eric's new identity: "Ike Applebaum?"


We get to meet the Vampire Authority next week.