Television Tourniquet: We Bite Into 'True Blood' 3.4



True Blood Episode 3.4
“9 Crimes”
Written By: Kate Barnow & Elisabeth R. Finch
Directed By: David Petrarca
Original Airdate: 11 July 2010

In This Episode...

Sookie finally gets a call from Bill, but not the call she is hoping for.  Bill tells her he has left Bon Temps - and her - for good.  “Our worlds are too different,” Bill tells her.  “You are no longer of concern to me.”  To really solidify the breakup, he tells Sookie that he fucked Lorena like only two vampires can.  Sookie is not giving up.  She is convinced that Bill is being coerced.

Alcide’s sister, Janice, gives Sookie a makeover to help her blend in with the wild werewolf pack.  While probing Janice’s mind, Sookie discovers that Debbie’s engagement party is really a “jump you into the pack” party, and Debbie is addicted to V.   Sookie uses this info to get Alcide to accompany her to Lou Pine’s.  At the bar, Alcide tries to convince Debbie it is not too late to leave Cooter’s pack, but she doesn’t want any part of his “pussy pack.”  The ritual sees Debbie crowd surfing her way to the stage.  Russell drapes her in wolf skins and opens his wrists over trays of shot glasses.  The V is passed out to the crowd, then Russell leaves and Cooter brands Debbie on the shoulder.  Cooter transforms into a werewolf to lick her wounds.  The crowd starts to shift and Alcide insists Sookie run. 

Bill is at a strip club near Lou Pine’s, procuring dinner for Russell and Lorena.  He chooses a young dancer with dead eyes as their meal.  As the two return to the limo, Bill feels Sookie’s fear as she races from the werewolf bar.  With sadness in his eyes, he instead climbs into the limo.  After a moment’s hesitation, Bill joins in the blood orgy.

Tara is under Franklin’s spell, trying to find out where Sookie is.  A phone call to Sookie yields nothing more than a general area.  The spell broken, Tara attempts escape, but you can’t escape a vampire.  Franklin bites her deeply, then binds her, gags her, and takes her across state lines in search of Sookie and Bill.  He doesn’t care about them, but his “employer” does.  Their destination?  Russell’s mansion.

Meanwhile, Eric saves Lafayette’s butt when a drug deal to some rednecks goes south.  He gets a call from Pam - Fangtasia is being raided.  She insists he save himself, but he zips back and finds Pam being tortured at the Magister’s hands.  He believes Eric is the source of the black market V - it’s either that or he commit treason by pointing the finger at Sophie-Ann.  Pam saves both their asses by blaming it on Bill.  Eric backs her up, and the Magister gives Eric two days to deliver Bill, otherwise Pam “dies for good.”

Elsewhere: Sam’s family, falling on tough times, take up residence in Merlotte’s parking lot.  After a talking-to with Tommy, Sam’s heart softens and he helps them get back on their feet.  Jessica takes up employment at Merlotte’s, and bumps into an old friend from bible study.  She glamours him into forgetting he ever saw her.  Jason feels threatened when he meets Kitch, the newer, younger version of Jason to hit town.  After Bud names Andy to be his successor as sheriff, Jason blackmails Andy into a police badge without all the tests and training.  Eric is having fantasies about Sookie seducing him.

Dig It or Bury It?

Tonight’s episode was really well-paced, and totally gripping.  In addition to the violence and the monsters, the show is speeding towards a power struggle between different vampire “clans,” with crazy werewolves as the cherry on top. 

Interestingly, this week’s episode was very emotional, but not in a whiney or obnoxious way.  Lorena is desperately in lust with Bill, while Bill has nothing but revulsion for her.  Franklin is desperately lonely and sees Tara as his soulmate, but Tara has nothing but revulsion for him.  Alcide is still in love with Debbie, and while Debbie isn’t necessarily revolted by her ex, she is certainly repulsed by his “pussy” lifestyle.  And Hoyt and Jessica... well, I just wish those two crazy kids would work things out.

Ass Factor

Mild nudity: the strippers that Bill hunts, a stripper for Eric at Fangtasia, and a hint of side-ass from Tommy as he dresses after a shift.  No actual sex, but Bill does tell Sookie that one of the reasons he liked fucking Lorena better was because he didn’t have to be careful with her - he could fuck her like crazy and hurt her all he wanted.  Lorena called it the best sex she had had in decades; Bill told her to get the fuck out.  Ah, romance.

Blood Count

The lines between violence and sex are always blurred.  Dead-Eyed Stripper thinks she is just joining a kinky party with some rich eccentrics.  Lorena goes first and strokes her softly... then yanks her hair back and digs in.  Russell follows, and with some prodding, Bill joins in.  There is a great aerial shot of the three of them chowing down on Dead-Eyed Stripper, her eyes finally alive with terror and pain.  The blood flows freely, and the final shot of the episode sees blood dripping from the limo door and pooling on the concrete.

Also kind of hot, in a BDSM way, is Pam, strung up on the rack that was once used for rough - but consensual - sex.  It is now a place of non-consensual torture, being scarred with a silver-tipped cane.  And in an unintentional bit of slapstick, Lorena taunts Bill, telling him he will love her again.  Bill responds by punching Lorena square in the face, sending her flying to the opposing wall.  

Myths Revamped

In Eric’s fantasy, he flies to Sookie’s hotel window, a dozen stories up.   Sookie is surprised to see him flying, and asks if all vampires can fly.  Eric offers a wise-ass answer: “Can all humans sing?”, which backfires when Sookie admits she can’t.


Tara, at the Vampire King’s mansion, sees Bill and begs for his help.  Franklin wants to make her his vampire bride.  Tara escapes - maybe it was the hideous, old-fashioned wedding dress he made her wear.  And Bill finally gives in and goes searching for Sookie.